The Anxiety of Treating Yourself When Self-Care Becomes Problematic

The Anxiety of Treating Yurself When Self-Care Becomes Problematic Forty dollar, potentially toxicraw water. Pricey massages. A $400 juicing machinethat doesnt even juice. unterstellung days, wellness is big business. The average person is constantly bombarded with hot new wellness trends promising to make them healthier, happier, and more relaxed. Many of unterstellung products and services praise the benefits of self-care, or prioritize the self to de-stress, enjoy life, and prevent burnout.Of course, this brand of self-care is drenched in irony. By making self-care into a task to check off the to-do list in your hectic schedule, many wellness trends create yet another yardstick to measure yourself by. At the same time, these trends can come with hefty price tags, making it sound like taking care of yourself requires a fancy, Silicon Valley-level paycheck.Self-care is SimpleLuckily, none of this is necessarily true. In fact, the idea that self-care is an obligation that you have to shell out big bucks to meet is totally counter to its goal.Thenotion of self-carewas popularized by the womens and black power movements of the sixties and seventies, whose activists argued that marginalized people had to prioritize caring for themselves to preserve their sanity in the face of social discrimination. It was also an important concept among counselors, emergency responders, and anyone whose job required helping people in difficult situations those who needed to charge their own mental and emotional batteries.The concept of self-care has now become mainstream, and thats good for everyone. In an increasingly interconnected world,stress is on the rise. And with a large body of scientific evidence that stress canliterally kill you, tending to the self is an integral part of mental, physical, and emotional health. But self-care definitely doesnt have to stress you out or break the bank. The secret is simple Just find what works for you.Give Yourself TimeTodays Americans are workingmore thanever, far more than their European counterparts. While this frenetic pace of work may feel productive, complete with social media humble brags that portray a long workweek as virtuous, there is increasing evidence that overwork can also kill you prematurely.In our highly scheduled world, wherein many of us remain connected to social mediaeven as we sleep, we suffer from a lack of unstructured time. Ironically, the idea of self-care as yet another obligation in a busy life entirely misses the point.Instead, one important way to care for yourself is simply to give yourself a little free time. Leave yourself a block in your week an afternoon, or if you can swing it, a whole day to do something unstructured, unscheduled, and just for your own joy. Whether its reading a book for pleasure, taking a bath, or playing with your kids, pure, unstructured time can work wonders.If youre crazy overscheduled, treat this time like an equally important obligation. We promise th e sky wont fall if you stop checking work email on Sunday.You Dont Have to Break Your Bank AccountWhile theNext Big Wellness Trendmay promise you health and happiness at a steep price tag, joy is priceless.Ask yourself What gives you pleasure? When youre busy and stressed out, which activities or relationships do you miss? What basic needs of yours food, rest, health are you neglecting? Make time to eat a fresh and delicious meal,get some exercisedoing an activity you like (take up belly dancing or yoga, play basketball with a friend), and get some rest. Sleep is not only super important for your health its totally free.For many of us, tending to our emotional and spiritual health can be an important gestalt of self-care, and a gesundheitsgefhrdender stoff we give for our own wellbeing. You can do this however it works for you, and on any budget. Try a meditation class (or free app), a religious service, or seek out affordable therapy (whether online or brick and mortar).If you c rave a little pampering and can afford the spa, thats great. But you dont need to do anything fancy to tend to your body and make yourself feel good. A hot shower with some aromatherapy, clean sheets and soft pillows, and a neck rub from a partner or friend can work wonders. And of course, some of the greatest pleasure in life comes from other people. Friendship is free. So is sex (and, for those days when you crave alone time, so is masturbation).Its About PeopleResearch has shown thatmuch of our health depends on our relationships. For those of us in caretaking roles, alone time away from relatives and friends can be a much-needed release. But if you work alone, are a parent with small children missing adult conversation, or simply thrive on company, getting together with friends or family can be an important form of self-care. Investing in strong relationships keeps you emotionally and mentally healthy in all aspects of life.In this sense,self-care is anything but selfish. Instea d, its about relationships, with other people and, most importantly, with ourselves. When we take time to charge our mental and emotional batteries, feel joy, and focus on the things and people that make life beautiful, we give ourselves the gift of increased happiness and emotional health.Self-care doesnt require fancy products, big bank accounts, or hot new trends. Instead, it requires something that cant be bought the wisdom to know what you need, and the compassion to give it to yourself.This article originally appeared on Talkspace.